oh the things you see when you've forgotten that you do have a camera with you.

i've almost completed my near daily migration to work this morning.. one more side street to navigate... what's this? some guy on a bicycle decides to move from the side of the road to the middle of the road. he's peddling pretty slowly i have no choice but to follow him or run him over... i'm in a good mood so i opt for the former. so exactly why is this blog worthy you ask?... let me tell you.

first - he's taking his dog out for a walk/run/drag. the poor animal just wants to stop and take a leak but is mostly keeping up with him. he's holding the leash in one hand while he pedals about.
second - let me describe his outfit. it was chilly this morning, so he's wearing some thick gloves, a hooded sweatshirt with the hood up underneath his aerodymanically styled bike helmet.
(hello fashion police) over the hoodie is a heavier weight jacket. and he's wearing blue spandex pants. yes. that's right
third- he's over weight and cellulousified. ew.

so here i am doing under ten miles an hour following mr fancy pants... don't you already know that the road is bumpy. his glutius, which is quite maximus has done a good job of swallowing the bike seat upon which it is resting (i think there's a bike seat there,) is jiggling wildly like a piece of jello in an earthquake... right in front of my face... i find myself so caught up in laughing like a maniac, that i don't even bother to blow the horn to get him to more his fat axe so i can get to work.

all i can think is that i wish that i had a camera... it's only after coffee that i realize i did indeed have a camera... butt then again, on second thought, maybe pretty lucky for you that i had forgotten all about it.. because funny as it was... that's not really something anyone wants to see.

so where the lesson here?... good question.

don't be a stranger
brian

is there anything worse than hippies with guitars?

i found myself at this party, quite a nice one... fun, sort of low key but not too low, no roaring drunks, good food, good music, good conversation, a few hotties and darts... people are coming and going and there's plenty of room to mill about. there are all sorts of people even some uh... the best i can describe them as is hippies or maybe hippie wanna bees. you know the sort. sort of dirty, a little greasy, mostly unkempt, near rasta hair, red eyed and smelling of herbs. now this is fine and ok with me... hey everyone has their place.
so anyway, i'm milling about, talking, playing darts and generally having a pretty good time and decide that it's a little stuffy and that it might be time for some fresh air. i decide to head for the porch, a friend notices and warns me, don't go out there. i think to myself what could possibly be so bad out there and decide to ignore his warning. as i approach, a different sort of sound reaches my ears and it almost sounds like music...
but not quite....
needless to say i don't remain very long...
it's the hippie wanna bees...
they're out there...
they have guitars, they almost know how to use them...
(now don't get me wrong here.. i have nothing against guitar players... i own more guitars than i do wearable shoes... and i know how to use them)
but they are singing...
folk music....
wow...
as i head back in and notice someone else is heading out for some air.
hey man don't go out there...
why not?
hippies.... with guitars....
oh. thanks man, i'll go out the back...

don't be a stranger
brian

just say it.. for crying out loud.

with a bustle bustle here
and a bustle bustle there
here a bustle
there a bustle
everywhere a bustle bustle...
holy moly it's that time again
eeek yipe eeek yike oh..

as if our lives weren't busy or complicated enough.
not this year... don't do it.
why not enjoy and take the time to look around and appreciate.
why not look past the flagrant commercialism... tell the cynic in you to just let it go.
do you realy need to be that busy.. that stressed?
why not take the time to thank God for what He has given you..
just importantly why not take the time to tell people in your life what they mean to you or just simply thank them... out loud... with words.

hmm.. too serious?

don't be a stranger
brian

from hotties on the highway to...

the other morning early on in my pilgrimage to the temple of employment, i glance up and receive a pleasant surprise. my word... there is a beautiful woman in my back seat. oh wait my car doesn't have a back seat.... ok so she's in the car behind me.. but she is beautiful... perfect shade of red lipstick (it's the first thing i noticed) great eyes and hair.. in fact as we pass in and out of the sunlight her whole face goes from mysterious to radiant and back again. i haven't seen a woman this stunning in quite some time... and oh, i am having a good day as she's followed me onto the highway and is keeping pace with me (not many people do...) i am so enjoying this experience. we hit traffic and there is a mercedes in front of me and holy moly another beautiful woman... traffic slows to a snails pace. no matter... today, i don't care. not one bit. it's a little strange because i'm not usually one to tease myself with situations that i'm pretty sure have no future... but for some reason i am just truly enjoying the commute today. as traffic starts to move again i get the feeling that the old grease ball oriental looking guy in the car to my right (which is so dirty i'm wondering how he's seeing out of those unbelievably cloudy windows,) wants into the left lane. sure enough he makes an asinine banzai move cutting off miss radiant behind me... dang... well, ok. there is still miss mercedes 2004... but not for long because within a minute some guy who looks like he might be a religious follower of the pro wrestling circuit nearly takes the nose off of my car as he puts his dent ridden rust bucket pos van right in my path... i use a bunch of brake and the horn to voice my displeasure at having gone from being surrounded by beautiful women to being turned into the meat in a fugly sandwich... stuck between mr. hoo flung poo and haystack callhooligan. well... it was nice while it lasted. there you have it.. from hotties on the highway to becoming the meat in a fugly sandwich... i've followed my own advice and have decided to just be thankful and enjoy the moment. you know, i still haven't forgotten miss radiant's face, come to think of it it is one the just might inspire a song.. i think i might get to work on that.

dont be a stranger
brian

waiting for something exciting to happen...

so, what are you doing?
I went to see "the incredibles" yesterday and it actually inspired a few thoughts to pop into my brian... mr incredible steps out of his car and in a sort of fit of frustration picks up a car into the air and this little kid in the audience hollers (in a cute little kid voice) "WOW! he's really strong!" it was good for a laugh and a thought of how amazing the innocent wonder of a child can be and how easy it is to loose that... the wonder of a new discovery, a moment, a song, a sunset, a special someone, the butterflies of being in love... lesson one.
ok so, back to the movie. as the car is in the air, mr incredible notices a kid on a trike watching him. so he puts the car down. the next time he comes home the little kid is there watching him. mr incredible asks, "what are you doing?" and the kid says.. "waiting for something exciting to happen." well that sort of stopped me. isn't that where i am... waiting for something wondrous and exciting to happen? why can't i take more time to appreciate the things around me? the things that God has put on my path to enjoy? Him, my daughter, friends, a moment, a laugh, a song... instead i find myself almost selfishly hoarding my moments in an attempt to save them for the "next big thing." foolishness, i tell you. oh i'm sure something big will happen sooner or later, hopefully it's a good thing, and now i'll try to remind myself not to miss too much along the way.
so, what did you say you were doing?

don't be a stranger
brian

hmm..

my daughter says she has a stomach ache and wants to stay home from church...
she's been in and out of the bathroom all morning.. either she's doing a good job of faking or well.. it's legit. i guess i'll buy it.

dont be a stranger
brian

eyes, smiles and rings... dang

i hear "they" say that the supermarket is a good place to meet women... for the purposes of this entry, i'll not hypothesize about who "they" are as we've all been there before and besides i'm sure my friend jay can probably scientifically prove that "nobody" knows anyway.
so... i don't know anyone who's had any degree of success at the grocery store... i know i certainly have not. now don't get me wrong there have been instances of flirting but.. eh.. it usually goes something like this:
a. ooh she's attractive and looks like she might be fun to get to know.
b. a casual look to the cart or basket reveals that it is not overloaded with "family" type groceries.. a good sign.
b. hey, she noticed me and has given a little eye contact and a smile.. the flirt-o-meter starts chiming.
c. i smile back... hey, if an attractive woman smiles at you.. you best be smiling back... well, if you're single and available (which i am)
d. now for the part that always kills me.. a quick glance to her left hand.
e. so far.. it never fails... i see rings...
f. smile again and keep going... dang...

well, time to do a little grocery shopping, wish me luck...

don't be a stranger
brian


ultra cool artist... i actually have one of his awesome prints

more fingers than teeth

punkin chunkin woo-eee...
now let me tell you that i had the pleasure of attending this event and it was quite a blast... literally. who in the heck would've thought that over 40,000 people (me included) would go to see... um... i'm not sure if this is the right word.. "people" launch/fire/shoot a 10 lb pumpkin anywhere from about 50 feet to almost a mile... holy crap! and i drove over 7 hours to do so. it all started quite innocently with me telling a friend of my most recent girl woes and ended with her inviting me to "punkin chunkin." there are really no words to describe this place... it's backwoods farm country delaware and an unbelievable mix of people; sandal wearing vegans, yuppies, engineering geeks, bubba in his overalls, mulleted child molester moustache bearers, beer guzzling fat chicks with 7 kids hangin on, under aged drunken hotties showing what they got, the crisply dressed butch megalomaniac southern policewoman who prolly did goebbles one better, the inbred redneck with more fingers than teeth and me.... again holy crap... who'd a thunk it. as for the machines... well.. the cannons and and the machines are indeed impressive with the amount of engineering that it takes to propel a pumpkin from about 50 feet to well over 3/4 of a mile with stored energy. in my book it was the adventuresome that were the stars of the show.. from the bicycle powered swinging arm with that launched a 20 or so pound pumpkin straight into the crowd (no injuries.. everyone saw it coming and had enough room to run) to the trebuchet that flung a pumpkin about 300 feet straight up into the air only to smash into the machine next to it. wham!!... hehe.
now let me 'splain something... i've been to county fairs but this was WAY over the top... another friend from a town called scratch ankle in alabama (no i'm not making this up) insists that i take his video camera (i don't own one) to capture this event... so here i am i'm walking around this gathering of pumpkin launching enthusiasts like a true nerd with camera, bags and a video camera strung from my neck... strung like he rockkafella place christmas tree and i am so caught up in this extravaganza that i shoot about 15 minutes of video and i take only one fricken picture. impressive eh? maybe i'll even post it. ok so i didn't actually take the photo of that "woman" with more fingers than teeth.. but she was really there.. i just thought that she'd kick my axe if she caught me taking her picture.....

don't be a stranger
brian

btw thanx cedia for the inspiration of a mystery idea

mystery link in honor of cedia

went AWAY for the weekend...

look for the new post soon.. maybe tonite
here's the teaser..
can you say
punkin chunkin??
heh

don't be a stranger
brian

ooh.. sparkly...

started to write a post last nite....
someone waved something shiny in front of me (a phone call,) chatted with an AIM buddy and then it was time for music practice.. another phone call and .. oh i needed sleeeeeep. so i'm still alive.. and maybe that post wasn't that good anyway. consider yourself lucky..

don't be a stranger
brian